Pipipipipipi

[inthejunk]

Hanamura Yosuke. I can't answer right now, but if you leave a message I'll be sure to get back to you!

Comments

[reassures]

[His knee gets spared a glance, and it covers up her look at the memory. Just what happened that she didn't know about...?]

Is it?

[But she passes him a pillow, in case he wants to sit on it, or lean against it, or whatever.]

[inthejunk]

Sure. If you say you're 18 when people ask how old you are the questions stop there, right? It's not like they're going to ask for a birth certificate.

[He takes the pillow, but instead of sitting on it he hugs it to his tense stomach. It's probably a girly thing to do, but Yosuke seems blissfully unaware of the fact.]

Did you say you wanted to get some tea?

[reassures]

[Oh, that's what he meant. She'd protest, but... well, Shika had done that when they got here, basically. And she was pretty sure you could teach yourself anything you'd learn in highschool... But she wasn't sure Yosuke would actually do that.

That works, too. She smiles, and leans back again.]

I don't mind staying here-- there's lots of tea and coffee in the kitchen.

[inthejunk]

Okay. What's up? I feel like all I've done lately is work. I spent my last day off sleeping it off, you know? Maybe we should go see a movie one day or something. What do you say?

[reassures]

--I haven't seen a movie in a long time. [Not one in a theater, anyway. Seeing movies in theaters in her world was a foreign concept, and in NG... it had been a very long time.]

It could be fun.

[inthejunk]

Great!

...So, um. You've never asked me around for no reason before. Are you alright?

[reassures]

[She hesitates a moment, before smiling a little sheepishly - though she doesn't exactly look at Yosuke when she does.]

It's quiet here.

[Which isn't exactly true. Nothing was ever quiet for her, not really, but--

Shika wasn't here anymore. She didn't know how to talk to Naruto right now. And god, Badou... she didn't even know what to say to him, how to start, if she ever could. She wasn't really his Nill. Just some cheap, lonely, busted imitation-- and she hopes the real Nill has a better name.

But who else did she have to go to, except the person that had made a point of spending time with her when Shika was gone?]

[inthejunk]

[A hint of a smile twitches at Yosuke's lips, even though he tries to hide it. Eventually the smile wins anyway, and he shakes his head.]

I guess you called the right guy, then.

[reassures]

[That makes her smile as well, and she nods her head a few times, almost but not quite enthusiastically.]

Of course I did.

[inthejunk]

Hmm...what do you want to talk about? To tell you the truth I don't have much news. Well...I'm doing better at work! I only spilled soup on one person this week.

[He glances off guiltily to the side.]

[reassures]

That's good.

[But...]

How have you been?

[inthejunk]

I just told you.

[Slightly nervous laughter, and a swift, violent shove of an attempt to re-bury all the incidents from the week out of his thoughts. No, Nill, he doesn't know you can pick up what he broadcasts, he just doesn't want them in his head any more than he wants them to accidentally leak out at you.]

Maybe we can go have that tea and talk about the weather like old people. It's stopped snowing, isn't t hat nice?

[reassures]

[ ... ]

Right.

[But there's something in her face that suggests she doesn't believe that's all that's going on.]

It is. [Pretty as it might be, the snow was much too cold for her. Ugh. But she moves to stand up again, brushing off her skirt idly. Tea it was, then. She smiles lightly, and waits for him to stand as well.]

[inthejunk]

[Yosuke flinches a bit at that expression. Man, he knows exactly how that feels, and he really hates it. But Nill worries about Shika way more than she should have to already. And if he told her this, she'd just worry more. Because something is definitely wrong with the guy, and it really is worrying.]

[He gets to his feet after Nill does, swallowing hard and reluctantly returning the pillow to her little nest. The thought actually gets a tiny smile from him, and an appreciative glance at her wings. Heh. Nest.]

What kind is there? I, uh...winter's a good time for peppermint, right? I mean. Something floral wouldn't taste good right now, would it?

[reassures]

[Ah. That thought stands out more than anything-- that something is wrong with Shika. But what? Something new? Something she doesn't know about..? It seemed like there was always something wrong, and so little she could do about it.]

You can hold onto it, if you want.

[A soft smile, and a gesture at the pillows. But she flutters her wings lightly - stretching, almost - before she heads to the door, gesturing for him to follow.]

I think we have peppermint.

[inthejunk]

[He still gets a kick out of her wings, and has to forcefully remind himself not to reach out and run a palm over one. He's a little embarrassed she noticed him clinging to the pillow, but maybe he can play it off...]

That's alright, there are chairs downstairs, right? It'll stay cleaner up here.

[He perks up again at the idea of peppermint tea. He's not sure he could have stomached anything floral and cloying, and he'd been sick enough that one day a few weeks back to never want to see the inside of a trash bin close up again. Anyway, peppermint really is a winter flavor, so that much at least won't cause Nill to be concerned.]

You know what this place could use? Some new paint. If you ever want to paint it, let me know. I'll definitely help, since it's so huge.

[reassures]

[Hard not to notice when he was clutching it to himself, but that's fine. It isn't unlike her to notice small things, and she thinks she would have even if she couldn't hear it. She nods though, and smiles, because it's true, it is cleaner up there.

Peppermint is good for nausea too, as far as she can tell, so she doesn't see why it's a bad plan. Nill smiles, headed downstairs and into the kitchen.]

I don't know if we can paint here. Do you think we can? [She certainly wouldn't mind more color...]

[inthejunk]

Sure, why not? Who's going to stop us?

[Yosuke winks, following Nill along cheerfully, and already pondering colors. Maybe a nice, pale yellow. Like morning sunlight. Or some minty green-and that one gets a song stuck in his head- or maybe even an earthy red...]

[reassures]

[They're all pretty colors, she thinks - though the song (or rather, the images associated with it) make her giggle, and Nill's glad for once that she can't actually laugh.]

I don't know. [He had a point, actually... Minako was gone, and so was Rin. Who would really stop them from painting if they wanted to?]

[inthejunk]

[To be fair, that was a really popular video! ...And those mint colored pants were kind of tight.]

[He nodded.]

So just let me know when you want to get started.

[reassures]

[She is not at all surprised that that is the part Yosuke remembers most vividly.]

I will.

[And into the kitchen they go! Nill immediately goes over to one of the cabinets and pulls it open, fishing around for the peppermint tea.]

[inthejunk]

[Yosuke paces nervously. The kitchen here brings back memories of a different bad night. He closes his eyes and manages to stop himself from shuddering, but his heart kicks up madly at the image that greets him behind his eyelids. HImself, but not. That painful and terrifying moment that his own blade pierced his shoulder, the frantic call that was meant to be to Souji...]

[And then, Shika. Grabbing him like some kind of monster and running up a building with him...taking him home and feeding him, patching up his palms where the callouses had come off...crying, when Yosuke introduced himself.]

[It takes him a second to shake it all off, and he grabs the wall a little dizzily from the perceived suddenness of his leap between the two times. But he smiles pleasantly at Nill, and clears his throat.]

You'll make someone a really happy man one day, Nill-san. You even keep the right kind of tea on hand.

[reassures]

[Nill is, in part, used to the suddenness with which memories can overtake her at times. Despite her mind being elsewhere, she calmly sets her palms against the counter, makes sure she's looking in the general direction of something so she doesn't look completely out of it. She's prepared for these things, after living like this for as long as she has now. If Yosuke can't shake it off, then it's nearly impossible for Nill to.

She is not, however, prepared for the images that meet her. The Shadow of her senpai; too young, she thinks, but the thought doesn't comfort her, because it's like reliving one of the worst days of her life. Reliving a nightmare. She feels the pain, but it's her shoulder this time, not her wing (they still snap back abruptly against her back), and then-- Shika. That wasn't right. Shika hadn't been the one to save her, that had been-- who?

This isn't her memory, isn't her head. She draws in a shaky breath, and then Shika is talking and she can hear the voice she's watching things from speak, introduce himself, as if they don't know Shika at all... and Shika cries.

When Nill collects herself again, she realizes her arms are wrapped around her ribs, and there are tears on her face, too. Memories are too sudden, too fast, and a lot of the time she'd helpless not to get caught up in them.

She hastily wipes at her eyes, and whatever Yosuke said seems to go right over her head.]

[inthejunk]

[The smile freezes on Yosuke's face for a second-the surest way to tell they're fake is when they stick and they shouldn't-and then drops off suddenly like falling over a steep and unexpected cliff.]

[Wait, what did he say? Shit. He made her cry and he can't even remember what the hell he just said to her...oh. Oh. Make some man happy...oh, man. Oh, man. Did that mean something? It would explain a few things.]

[For a moment he's still and sick with rage that he can't even direct at anything. His stomach churns with renewed vigor, and something in his ribs expands white and hot and he has to swallow hard and shake it off before he kicks the wall or something and startles her. She doesn't need that right now. She needs him to be gentle, and keep his stupid comments to himself.]

Hey...hey, don't-I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. Please don't cry.

[He starts to reach forward with the tip of his sleeve, to dry her eyes. But he realizes just in time what a stupid mistake that would be, and snatches his hand back as if he's nearly burned it, taking a step away at the same time.]

W-why don't you sit down, okay? I can make the-[his stomach lurches again, silently objecting to the idea of swallowing anything, and he puts a palm to it to settle it]-tea. I'm getting pretty good at it, even. I do it at work all the time!

[Please don't be sad...]

[reassures]

[It doesn't help that she can hear everything going through his head right now; that he wants to reach out, to help, to do something, but he's afraid to because it's so obvious to everyone that looks at her that she's untouchable. And normally she likes it that way, prefers it even, but--

For one terrible moment she's young again, typing frantically, alone in some room while-- someone, someone that did horrible things to her and still haunts her nightmares, even though they no longer have a face or a name-- posts on the network. And she begs and pleads and they just make the message bigger and everyone sees it, everyone she's ever cared about. They all know. Everyone knows about her.

Her face contorts, and Nill brings a hand up to muffle a sob that wouldn't even make that much noise anyway, because she can't speak. She can't yell, can't shout, can't argue, nothing without it being done deliberately. She can't even scream, and she certainly can't 'talk' to Yosuke.

All Nill can do is move; and so she does. She shakes her head almost frantically, and hugs Yosuke (regardless of the hand against his stomach), wings still trembling against her back.

...Nill hates herself all the more, because she's almost certain she wouldn't have hugged her senpai like this before he left.]